Family / 25 January 2013
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Because I Didn't Love Him, I Refused to Serve My Husband
Zee Official Writer
The wedding was supposed to be very special. Robert, the groom, seemed very happy. However, it doesn’t seem that way with the bride. What happened?
10 days before the wedding, Elisa Sri Indahsari had already refused the marriage that her parents had arranged for her. The reason was because he didn’t love the man that they had chosen for her, Robert Sunarto Putro. Yet her refusal made her father furious.
With the reason that she did not appreciate the parents’ efforts, Elisa’s father was very furious that he became violent. He slapped her, pulled her hair, and drenched her with water every time Elisa talked back to her father.
Because of that violence, Elisa who had already felt hatred towards her father insisted on being as stubborn. Fortunately, when her father’s violence got even worse, Elisa was helped by her neighbor. Elisa’s life was saved at that time.
To be brief, Elisa was finally willing to follow her parents’ wish, which was marrying Robert. Yet just like other families that based on no love, her newly-born family was always full of conflicts. Especially when Elisa refused to fulfill her role at their first night, problems kept on rising between them.
Robert, who felt deserved to be sexually served by Elisa, tried to find many ways so that his wife would make love to him. But all his efforts were pointless. On the contrary, Elisa started to feel that he did not understand her and he did not love her. Therefore, when another man approached her, she accepted his hands.
“He said that he was sympathetic of me, that he liked me. So I felt like “oh there was still someone who cared for me, who actually loved me”. I needed someone who loved me, and he did love me, so yeah, I accepted him. Yet when we were trying to make love, my hands and feet accidentally hit and kicked him.”
“He then let me go and said, “It’s okay. You’re still learning.” But the moment when I really stopped and broke up with him was when he said, “We both love each other and care for each other. That is God’s grace.” Then I realized that yeah, love was God’s grace, but our relationship was a mistake. We both had a spouse. That’s why it was a mistake. A sin. So I broke it off,” said Elisa.
When Elisa was in the affair, Robert was pursuing her career in Jakarta. He also joined a spiritual counseling.
“A man’s perfection is God’s perfection. I was healed and I repented from my sins, especially the ones that I had done to my wife. Then I learned that a wife is priceless, so I wrote a love letter for my wife, and I found myself deeply in love with her,” said Robert.
“I followed my husband when he moved to Tangerang. Even then, we didn’t yet touch each other. I’m impressed. I couldn’t do it, he knew, and he was willing to help. So gradually, even though we did not do anything. He accepted it,” said Elisa admitting.
Robert’s love and acceptance brought changes in Elisa’s heart. “I kept asking to God, “You have given me a husband, although I didn’t like him at first. But if he really is the one, why can’t I bring myself to let him touch me? God, please help me.”,” said Elisa crying.
Robert’s patience was finally worth it. Their relationship was getting better, and Elisa gradually accepted their intimacy, “I loved him even more and more. Then I can finally bring myself to his embrace, and we made love. It was all because of my husband’s patience.”
Nine months later, miracle happened. Elisa and Robert was given a child.
One day, Elisa braced herself to tell her story to her spiritual councelor, “She called me and asked me to come to the service. I followed every events at the service. When God’s words were given, I was reminded about our Father’s heart—we might be disappointed by our father in this earth, but our Father in Heaven is far bigger, He knows us. He cares for us. He understands our needs.”
“Then I realized that I had to let go of my hate and bitterness towards our parents. So I stepped forward and everyone prayed for me. It was that moment I let it all go away, all the anger and hate, and I began to forgive my father. I was crying and grateful throughout the service that there really was someone who really loves me.”
Elisa thought that God was finished on her on that day, but suddenly on the second session of the service, God visited her again. She forgave everyone who had hurt her, especially all the men who sexually harassed her, her husband included.
Upon her return from the service, Elisa made a confession to her husband. Tears on her cheeks, she confessed her affair and she told him that she was ready if her husband would like to leave and divorce her. But unexpectedly, her husband was not angry. He told her that it was okay and invited her to prayer.
“I was crying all the way through the prayer because I thought, “Oh my God, how did I get such a nice husband.”.”
After that, Elisa let it all go, all of her the terrible past that she had experienced. And she was healed by God as well as her husband. This family is now full of God’s grace and love. Robert also expressed his gratitude to God.
“My wife and my kid are my ultimate grace from God and I really thank Him for His eternal peace is very abundant for my family.”
Source of Testimony :
Elisa Sri Indahsari
Sumber : jawaban.com / Zee
